Fast Food Commercials = Vodka

Fast food commercials are like vodka-transparent, addictive, and if consumed to quickly, can make you perform abnormal feats. In other words, a person knows the marketing techniques behind the oh so scrumptious commercials, but instead of turning the channel, he watches the mouth watering advertisements of deception over and over until he just can’t take it anymore; he grabs his keys, flies to Taco Bell, and orders the right half of the menu so he can proudly scream, “I’M FULL! But I think I’m gonna hurl.”

Despite the fatty consequences and better judgment, people are repetitively fooled into believing that just one more Big Mac couldn’t possibly hurt them or maybe biggy sizing isn’t all that bad; however, they are blinded to what can really happen when too much fast food is consumed, and I’m not just talking about a few extra pounds.

Imagine this: Billy comes home from work and immediately flips on the tube, and just as he expected, there are commercials after commercials advertising the fatty but tasty fast food. He decides, even though he’s not quite sure why, that he is hungry so he heads out in search of a quick, greasy meal. Turmoil floods his mind as Billy soon realizes that he can’t decide between a Whopper or a Quarter Pounder, between curly or straight fries, between a milkshake or a super-sized soda. Undoubtedly, Billy decides he’ll take it all just like those people on Super Market Sweep who fill their buggies with goodies and treats; oh they’re so liberal and exciting.
After Billy’s consumed more than his fair share, he wakes up feeling groggy and disoriented; he can’t quite remember what has happened or why he has a splitting tummy ache, but he forges on just like Jack Bower on his favorite show 24; he’s so brave and cool.

Billy oh so gently reaches for the remote over his aching belly as if he’s trying to diffuse a bomb and, once in grasp, quickly flips the T.V. on, because he’s missing Oprah; she’s so opinionated and independent. But Billy soon finds that his views of Oprah are about to take a turn for the worst. He watches in horror as she chastises her many guests who wake up everyday feeling depressed and overly dependent upon T.V. and fast food. With out even thinking, Billy jumps to his feet, despite his sore torso, and screams and defames Oprah and her overrated show of deceit. Once he is calm, Billy climbs down from his couch just as Tom Cruise did from Oprah’s; he’s so weird and insane. Billy soon becomes flooded with guilt and questions of how he could ever become mad at Oprah. No one except for bad mothers, child molesters, or thieves can get mad at Oprah. She’s an icon. Well, you could get mad if you’re a raging Communist like Dick Chaney, but he isn’t even in the same league to dislike Oprah.

Billy soon realizes maybe he to, just as Oprah’s guest, is a fast food junky. He didn’t like waking up wondering why cheese paper was stuck to his foot or having an odd sensation of feeling pregnant. If you suffer from some of the same symptoms, you might be addicted to fast food too. Try turning off the T.V., refuse to watch commercials of deception, and hide the remote-unless Oprah’s coming on. You can beat fast food addictions. Rule what goes into your mouth; don’t let it rule you or your actions.